Engrish
04/08/04

Most people already know, but Engrish is the common name for the Asian way of trying to speak English. I'm not saying that speaking a foreign language is an easy task, but when you listen to them struggling around trying to speak, it's just some plain ol' funny shit! Below are some of my favorites and a few links you should check out for a more complete listing of Engrish.

Traffic instructions in an English language handbook (courtesy of the Dragon's Roar):

At the rise of the hand policeman, stop rapidly. Do not pass him by or otherwise disrespect him.

When a passenger of the foot hove in view, tootle the horn; trumpet at him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage tootle him with vigor and express by word of mouth warning, "Hi, Hi."

Beware of the wandering hourse that he shall not take fright as you pass him by. Do not explode the exhaust box at him. Go soothingly by.

Give great space to the festive dog that shall sport in the roadway.

Avoid entanglement of dog with wheel spokes.

Go soothingly on the grease road as there lurks the skid demon.

Press the brake of the foot as you roll around corner to save collapse and tie up.

When meeting an advancing person tootle your horn vigorously and he will disappear.

Vertical parking only.

Have many accidents here.

Try bigger and bigger but keep more and more slowly.

Let's reduce noise by ourselves.

Cars will not have intercourse on this bridge.


From engrish.com:







Engrish.com has a very large collection of Engrish.


The Dragon's Roar is written by a guy who spent a lot of time in Japan. It has several informative pages, but scroll down to the Engrish section to laugh your arse off.


staff out...


Previous News  |  The Ekaj Archives  |  Back to Main  |  Next News


Questions? Comments? Sugestions?  E-mail the staff.