Well, around 3 AM last Saturday night, I was right in the middle of my ritualistic channel surfing when something caught my eye. My television had landed on a program called The Bomb Shelter which airs on TBN (Trinity Broadcasting Network - a Christian programming channel). What I saw was a bunch of teenagers hanging out with some old guy talking about not having sex. At first I was confused because I thought they wanted it, but as I listened I realized well, they do want it, they just won't let themselves have it. Anyway, it was really weird to see them talking to the old guy because he was all dressed up in a t-shirt and jeans and he was wearing an ear ring and had a teenager styled haircut. This made me think.

Something should be done about this.

So, as the show progressed, it just got stranger and stranger and all the while, the old dude was acting like he wasn't old. He just pranced around acting like he was "one of the boys" and was talking to them about handjobs or something or other.

Something should be done about this.

I swear, it was downright disghusting to see him with all these kids. You can just tell that one of these days he's going to be arrested for molesting one of them. Toward the end of the show, they gave a web site address - thebombshelter.org.

Bingo...

So, I visit their website and it's all "life is beautiful" and such. There's a bio section for the host. It says that he once had a gig on some Australian version of MTV or some such shit. Well, there's also a response section where they want you to tell them what you think. Normally, I would at least try to partially restrain myself. But hey, they were asking for it. So here's the letter I wrote them:

Wow...amazing. Well, kindof. OK, look I'm a Christian and all, but not the kind of punk that can be brainwashed. I see what thebombshelter is trying to do and actually I agree with your message. However there are a few things that can REALLY be improved about the show.

The first thing I noticed about the show was how shiny all the people were. Were they bright and shiny with a Christian love? NO! They were shiny because obviously you do not have a makeup department. Please, if you want people to take the show seriously, all the guests on the show need a healthy coating of makeup. Have the producers of the show ever watched a final version of an episode?

OK, the next problem is a big one. The host. Again, wow. This guy, what is he forty? You've got this really old guy trying to connect with youth. Obviously the producers saw this problem and tried to "correct" it by making him wear t-shirts and earrings and getting a "cool" haircut. OH MY GOD! Have you completely missed the point? If you dressed this guy up like that thinking that there may be a gap between him and the target youth audience, you are 100% right. However, dolling him up only makes him look like an even bigger joke. People see right through him. It looks like he has something to hide. And frankly, those earrings make him look gay.

I left them my e-mail address as well. Oddly enough, I haven't gotten a reply.


staff out...

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