The movie Underworld came out a few weeks ago. The concept is that Vampires are at war with Lycans (and since the movie undermines your inteligence and says "werewolves" after each time they say "Lycans" then we will too). It looked dark and spooky kindof like it would fit into the Blade series. What went wrong?

First off it was like they rounded up 10 drunk guys, told them the concept of the film and then had each one of them write about 15 pages of the script. There was absolutely no continuity. Sure, there was the overall storyline of Vampires vs Lycans (werewolves) but then they had to go and really fuck it up. The plotline (if you can call it that) was twisted more than a cheap hooker.

Then there was the "acting". I don't think it could've got much worse. Cold, dead and non-emotional. Sure, that's fine for undead by the books, but not for a movie. Hell, I've seen more charisma in an NPC than in the lead actor! The only guy that even tried to show a little emotion just looked silly because it was obvious that he had never acted before. I think the director just picked him because he had long hair.

There's not much else to say about this movie except that it sucked a lot more than blood. It was a waste of $5 (thank God we just went to the matinee) but more importantly, it was a waste of 2 hours.


staff out...

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